How do we find someone to love? For many years, this question baffled me. I had no idea. None of my relationships worked out and I spent many single years wondering where all the available men had gone. Eventually, though, I found my answer. I’ll be getting married in a few weeks, at 48.
Easter is a time of hope, renewal and new beginnings so how can we bring that fresh energy into our dating life? I know from speaking with single friends and coaching clients that the dating process can wear people down. But if we approach dating feeling downhearted, it’s probably not going to go too well. So here are some ideas to freshen up your romantic life:
Dating involves lots of decision-making. From choosing whom to message online, to wondering whether to go on date two or three, to choosing whether to commit to a long-term relationship or get married, there are so many choices to make. So how do we know when to say ‘Yes’ and when to walk away?
As I write this, I’m preparing to host a dating workshop for young adults with cancer. This isn’t my usual audience and I’m rather daunted by the prospect. But I’m also clear on what I’m going to say: that anyone who is looking for love can benefit from solid foundations, a strong inner anchor, healthy self-esteem, emotional resilience, a good dose of trust and bags of faith.
The Christmas message is one of hope but if we’ve been single for a long time or dating without success for a while, Christmas can also be a tricky time. With so much focus on family, the festive season can stir up mixed emotions for those of us whose prayers have yet to be answered or whose dreams have not yet come true.
If I hadn’t managed to open my rather closed heart and mind, I wouldn’t be getting married in June. When I first began to date my fiancé, I found all manner of things about him to judge and criticise. I’d done the same with boyfriends in the past. If I’d have continued like that, I’d still be alone.
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